My Difficult Mother-In-Law To be

Friend A: Mr Corn, aren't u getting married?
Mr Corn: Yes, I am.
Friend A: So when is ur big day?
Mr Corn: I dunno.
Friend A: What do u mean by u dunno...its u who is getting married!
Mr Corn: .....

*Clap clap* The above conversation has been repeating itself months and months again. Many would have thought that this lucky-go-happy Mr Corn isn't serious about marriage.

Well, when u have a mother-in-law to be who is all about traditions (regardless they make common sense or not) and thinks that planning marriage is easy in Sg as in China. U got a whole load of problems and uncertainties @ hand.

My parents actually wanted the big wedding day to be of liking to my mother-in-law to be, so they suggest her to decide. But, she answered "the guy side suppose to take care of it, Must be some auspicious date". With my mum a Christian and my dad an atheist, it is not in their belief. However, my mum being computer-illiterate was unable to find " 通书" the so-called great book that contains all the "u should do this and u shouldn't on which dates".

Anyway, it doesn't matter to me much which date the big day should be. I just need to find a date which is so called "auspicious"...finally "Mr Google" show me 2 " 通书"s @ sina Web (China website) as well as one local Singapore one. Checking the contents of both, they are almost the same. Any " 通书" should be the same throughout, isn't it? Getting my mum to access the information and read the " 通书", she decided June will be a good time for my Dad to attend and then selected careful the date that reads auspicious for wedding. Finally solved the hassle of finding a big day right?

Not so fast, a reply from my mother-in-law to be says she is unable to check coz the printed version/calendar isn't out. I took pains to explain Sina Web (china own leading website) got 通书 and i have checked. She just brush off my explanations saying "she will check to see if the date is suitable for she hope that everything is well for us" Fair enough, I offered even to print out the 通书 from SINA website and then send to her. She asked me not to worry. But when would i know? Ans she gave is when i need to know... ZzzzZZZZz

Any couple who tried to arrange for a traditional wedding dinner knows that, In Sg we need to reserve the restaurant months before the actual day. Finding make up artist, photographers, wedding car, decor, checking on procedures on ROM and application of PR for my wife to be, flats application, i have to do it all by myself. Can't my mother-in-law to be make any things simpler? With my wife to be and her mother who can only stay in SG for no longer than a week and my wife to be cannot be in sg for any other reason like sight seeing, finding jobs OR accustoming to lifestyle of SG. (Note the word: "OR" chinese means "huo ze"). To pile up my misery, i do not even know when they are coming to Sg for me to plan for ROM.

I decided to break my silence and call my mother-in-law and painfully managed to get her to say "Go ahead to do with ROM stuff and let her know when the date was". Do not get me wrong to say that mother-in-law is a bad person. She is a kind person who is just bent on her own ideas and bound by stupid traditions of Chinese. Isn't alot of traditions in 封建时代 which enslaves million of Chinese women to their ideas. If following the tradition, if my wife did not give birth to a son that carry the family name in future,does it I can look to other women to help carry on the family's name? This is plain stupid. By the way, men in the region of Fujian can dun lift a finger to help with household chores. Rules are dead but humans aren't.

As a total opposite to my character who do not like to bound to traditions, logical in thinking and being broad thinker in many ways...It is extremely hard for me.
Being marriage across countries, we all have to give and take. But somehow i find myself in position of giving in, giving in and giving in. Surely Misery loves company. Any difficult parents-in-law out there? Please let me know to make me feel better.

Lastly, in the name of love for the wonderful lady i am about to married to, understanding the background culture of the place (which i extremely detest their thinking patterns and thoughts Not the people), I have to endure, endure and endure.
I will write someday about "traditions and its stupidity" both in religion views (bible Pharisees and how this so called men of God use traditions to enslave many minds of jews that time). need some time to research. It isn't just Chinese enslaving themselves with traditions!